I watched Fire in Babylon last night. What a terrific flick. Botham: The Legend of ’81 is also worth watching if you haven’t seen it already. The problem for us cricket nuts, however, is that there are few decent cricket films out there. It’s a scar on our magnificent game.
The world of football is saturated with cringe worthy titles such as Goal, Goal II, When Saturday Comes and Escape to Victory (ok, the latter is actually pretty good after a few beers at Christmas), but there are few cricketing equivalents. Isn’t it about time someone redressed the balance?
So we’ve been thinking. Let’s have your ideas for the cricket films they should have made (or the ones they could make in the not too distant future). Once we’ve got a decent list, we’ll get in touch with our good friend Steve Spielberg. I’m sure he’s an avid reader of TFT.
We’ll get the ball rolling. What about a documentary featuring never-before-seen footage from the Pakistan dressing room during the Lord’s Test of 2010. They could call it Dirty Rotten Scoundrels 2.
And what about a re-make of Liar Liar, with Salman Butt starring in Jim Carey’s role? I’d pay good money to watch both.
If you haven’t got any decent ideas for plots, just give us a working title – we can fill in the details. One idea we’ve been toying with is Indiana Jones and the Temple of Boon. The heroic life of the Australian dwarf with the handle-bar moustache is surely Hollywood material.
I’d also like to do a spoof called Blazing Siddles, in which Australia’s clown-resembling fast bowler is dispatched to all parts of the Adelaide Oval by Kevin Pietersen. It would be a huge hit in England, although ticket receipts down under might be a tad disappointing.
My final idea would be a flick called Kallis in Wonderland, in which the Cricket Boks’ burley all rounder finally manages to shed a few pounds, re-grow his hair, and become a hit with the ladies. Maybe he should talk to Shane Warne? Now that was a fairytale ending.
There’s an endless supply of cricketing titles just waiting for serious directors to consider, then reject. If you want some inspiration, search #cricketfilms on Twitter. Thanks to those who follow us for their suggestions. Star Waughs, anyone? We all know who would play Yoda.
James Morgan
Hi James, I have ‘the’ screenplay that will bring Hollywood and Bollywood together and a potential audience of 1.5 Billion, a baseball-to-cricket movie entitled “The Willow Tree”. I’ve been touting it around town (London), although set on three continents and budgeted at $35M there are real challenges in the production. I’m happy to send you the Synopsis (email to danielclee[at]mac.com).