Surrey won the championship title yesterday after beating luckless Worcestershire at New Road. As a Worcs fan it makes me sad, as we’re probably headed back to the second division despite playing well at times this year. However, one has to admit that Surrey are worthy champions. What’s more, they’ve done things the right way. Yes they’ve brought in the likes of Elgar and Morkel, but they’ve also got several young homegrown cricketers. And that’s what...
And Then Came The Evening Session: Day 1 at The Oval
It was all going swimmingly in the morning. TMS were even predicting a day 5 finish. The pitch looked so tame. There was no pace, no swing, no sting. It was almost Melbourne 2017ish. And everyone assumed it was just a matter of time before Alastair Cook signed off his test career the way he started it: with a ton. But then lunch happened. And it was a completely different game thereafter. Whatever the ball ate with its pasta – steroids I assume – produced an almost surreal change in...
Cut and Paste
This is getting old now. England’s batting ineptitude is almost boring. What more can we say that we haven’t already said ten times before? The batting order is a complete mess. I pretty much disagree with every move Ed Smith and Bayliss have made, simply cannot understand how two experienced cricketing minds have made such nonsensical decisions, and if I had any hair left I’d definitely pull it out. Fortunately for my hoover it fell out years ago due to the stress Smith’s predecessors exposed...
Vince Back. And Smith’s Got Cook’s Back
It’s official. Ed Smith is trolling us. Not only has he kept faith with Keaton Jennings and Alastair Cook, possibly England’s least convincing opening partnership since Tim Curtis and Martyn Moxon strode out at Trent Bridge on 12th August 1989 (and made a combined total of two runs), but he’s also recalled everyone’s favourite punchbag: a certain James Michael Vince. I can neither confirm nor deny entirely fictional reports that Joe Clarke muttered the words “Smith...
Taking The Positive (Singular)
England have been thoroughly outplayed at Nottingham in every department: batting, bowling, and fielding. If there was a food or lingerie department at Trent Bridge, we’d probably have been outplayed in that too. India have improved immeasurably in this game whereas England have gone backwards. Actually, scrap that, our batting hasn’t gone backwards because it was already at the bottom of Mount Everest with nowhere else to slide. It was just as bad here as it has been all series...
What The Hell Was That?
Thanks a bunch England. I was going to take a breather from TFT this week as I’ve belatedly moved into a new house. I’ve been up to my eyeballs in boxes (that’s boxes of the cardboard variety not men’s abdominal guards), and I was planning to simply write a summary at the end of the test rather than compose daily updates. And then shit happened. Unpleasant shit. And England lost all ten wickets in a session for just 38 runs. It all seemed to be going ok at lunch. Batting...