So I’ve had a couple of beers. I’ve got a third on the go. And it’s time for me to update the blog. I doubt this will be my most coherent effort but the time feels right. After all, the Ashes feel like they’re slipping away once again. We’ve been here before, of course, but I doubt even Ben Stokes at his best can get England out of this hole. And Joe Root has already been dismissed so I’m not sure who else is going to make the runs. I suspect this hole will...
Is The Writing On The Wall Again Already?
Our chances of winning the Ashes diminished considerably today. In fact they probably halved. England need to win either this test match or the one at The Oval to wrestle the urn back from the antipodean anti-heroes. And, after two days play in Manchester, it seems as plain as the nose on Gonzo’s face that we aint gonna win this one. In fact, we’ll be lucky to get out of this game with a draw. Australia’s total of 497-8 is a big one. A really big one. And I’m more...
Sacrificial Lambs
Ladies and gentlemen. I’d like to introduce you to Joe. No, not Joe Root, the other Joe. The one who plays for Kent. Joe Denly. Isn’t his coat nice and fluffy? He’s sure to fetch a good price at market. Now where did I put that meat cleaver? Here at England team headquarters we love a good sheep. As long as they’re white. We don’t like black sheep like that one called Alex. We thought his superb white ball form might make make him an England opener a couple of...
Stoking It Up
How’s your hangover? Mercifully mine has finally dissipated. Sunday night was one hell of a party and I spent most of Monday wondering whether the damage to my liver would be permanent. Luckily, however, I survived. And I’m slowly beginning to digest what happened. So after my somewhat dazed and confused post 48 hours ago, this article will try to make sense of it all and assess where the series stands now. Let’s start with the positives. Ben Stokes has almost single-handedly...
Ben Stokes
When I sat down to write this headline all the usual superlatives went through my head. Awesome. Sensational. Insane. I even toyed with the headline The Miracle of Headingley ’19. But in the end only two words felt right. Only two words encapsulated all the superlatives I could ever regurgitate: Ben Stokes. This summer we’ve seen English cricket’s infant terrible – see I can throw in the odd cliche as well multiple hyperboles – grow into the player we all hoped he...
The Day We Kissed The Ashes Goodbye
What a terrible day. It was miserable. The worst. The hope generated by Jofra Archer yesterday has completely evaporated, and now we have to contemplate our fears becoming reality – fears those of us who care deeply about our first class game have harboured for years. As I watched England collapse to 67 all out I was shellshocked. But at the same time I don’t think anyone was surprised. We’ve been bowled out for under 100 a record 4 times onTrevor Bayliss’s watch. The...