Captain Cranky is fan dabi dozi for England

The phrase ‘a bulldog chewing a wasp’ was made for Ricky Ponting. As England piled on the runs yesterday, the Aussie skipper was not a happy man. The metaphorical raincloud appeared above his head, he chewed his gum at an increasingly frenetic rate, and his outrageous dissent after lunch (when the third umpire refused to give Kevin Pietersen out caught behind) was as ugly as anything we’ve seen on a cricket field this winter.

When Ponting trudged back into the outfield, hands on hips, chuntering to himself under his scruffy green cap, Ponting resembled a pouting schoolboy. In fact, he looked more like Jimmy Krankie than the captain of an international cricket team.

England fans love nothing more than a good old Ponting temper tantrum – and yesterday the Australian captain threw his Christmas toys out of his pram like never before.

Ponting’s behaviour was petulance personified: he sulked on his teammates, questioned the umpires, and he snarled at his opponents like a pantomime villain. Whenever the ball sped past his outstretched arms, the Barmy Army should have shouted ‘it’s behind you’; if England can take ten Australian wickets over the next three days, the chants could apply to Ponting’s career as well.

When Sky asked Jonathan Trott what he thought of Ponting’s behaviour, England’s centurion couldn’t help but smirk. Whenever Ponting loses his cool, England invariably win the match.

Whereas Strauss exudes calmness and professionalism in the face of adversity or provocation, Ponting’s penchant for petulance lets Australia down. When a team is on the rack, leadership and clear thoughts are required. Instead, Ponting reacts like a wild dog – he growls at anything that moves and lets his emotions control his actions.

Ponting has been fined 40% of his match fee for his protracted rant at Aleem Dar and Tony Hill, but he could end up paying a lot more. His poor performances with the bat, his tactical limitations, and his appalling on-field behaviour means there’s a real chance that Ponting could get boned before Sydney.

James Morgan

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