Calm down ladies. England’s blonde Adonis isn’t actually making a comeback yet. The headline refers to Stuart’s sister, Gemma. With practically every member of the squad carrying an injury at present, desperate times call for desperate measures. England won’t be able to call up replacements from outside the fifteen man squad during the World Cup, so why not try a woman?
Despite having a backroom staff that makes Mariah Carey’s entourage look miniscule, England are still struggling to find XI for the seventh ODI. Even the kit man, Daz Suds, and the coach driver, Jack Wheeler, are suffering from back strains. The situation has got so bad that Andy Flower is making a return to the international arena, while bowling coach David Saker is set to make his debut at the age of 44.
England fans shouldn’t panic though. Gemma Broad has all the right credentials to adapt seamlessly to international cricket. She’s from fine cricketing stock and developed a fine tactical acumen while working as England’s analyst. She’s also tall, swings the ball at pace, and has a record of dismissing international batsmen … albeit in the garden bowling at her father and brother.
James Morgan
I’m afriad the regular dismissal of England batsmen doesn’t confer international standards, though I am sure Gemma would bring something to the on-field team (Aussie crowds might actually like one of our team)
I’m also curious: what is covering Broad’s medals?