Garbage – Day 3 at The Oval

I’m writing this on the train coming back from The Oval after a couple of pints. I’ll start with the positives.

Erm.

Now on to the considerable negatives. Those of us who said Pakistan’s tail couldn’t wag, and that their lack of batting depth prevents them from being a top side, need to eat a copious slice of humble pie. Their tail was excellent today and gave the sublime Younus Khan more than enough support. Amir in particular played some lovely shots. Yes, he had a few slices of luck, but so what? England looked clueless and utterly impotent in the field.

Our lack of a decent spinner really cost us dearly. Shah bowled cannily in the evening session and showed us exactly what we’re missing. I also think Cook had a stinker in the field. His captaincy has improved recently but he made a lot of bad calls today. Giving Root the first over after lunch when England really needed to go hard at Pakistan after the interval? Give me a break.

Cook also bowled Moeen at the wrong times. Younus was taking him to the cleaners yet Cook persisted with the spinner despite the fact that Amir would’ve been much more vulnerable to pacemen early in his innings.

Now we come to the batting. Cook was squared up several times and looked scratchy. Hales was just plain scratchy.  And as for James Vince, holy hell what the **** was that? The only saving grace is that he got out quickly. Hales made us all suffer for 55 balls for his tortuous 8. I should also mention that Joe Root looked completely carefree when the situation demanded something more intense.

My overall feeling today is that England looked nothing like a contender for No.1 in the rankings. We were utterly feeble in all departments. The mere suggestion that we’re the world’s best team is side-splittingly hilarious. Sorry to be so blunt, but No.1 teams don’t flirt with innings defeats at home.

Before I sign off, and find a dark corner to lick my wounds and calm down, a word about Pakistan. When I was younger, and even more foolish than I am now, I used to feel bitter whenever England lost. I felt little joy for our foes when they sent England packing.

I’m 40 now, considerably less patriotic, and a tad more philosophical. Consequently I feel genuinely happy for our visitors. To see a modern great like Younus score 200 in the flesh today was a real privilege.

I think Pakistan a likeable team, full of players who are entertaining to watch, and from where I’m sitting the series seems like it’s been played in the right spirit. The animosity that characterised previous series between England and Pakistan has been conspicuous by its absence. And that’s got to be a good thing.

Sometimes it’s easy to forget that Pakistan’s players earn a fraction of their English counterparts. They can’t play at home and they can’t play in the IPL either. What’s more the PCB’s finances are dwarfed by the ECB’s. If they go on to win this test and square the series it will be a true underdog story. Well played guys.

James Morgan

12 comments

    • Bags of talent, brains of a porkpie ?
      In any event, looks like the end of his test career, unless he can go away and make an awful lot of runs n county cricket next year.

  • Yes, Pakistan have played this series in good spirit and doggedness. I can’t put put my finger on it, but, there’s something churlish about this England side. Cook has not uttered one word of credit to Pakistan in any interview I’ve seen…Anderson has been a pain, and Hales, supported by Broad, has had a complete brain fart!
    8-8 in the Super Series…in case anybody had forgotten about that #straussgenius

  • Well… I don’t really need to say anything but this side is simply a poor test side. Media and fans are just to gullible to see it

  • While England were telling themselves how vulnerable the Pakistan team is they completely lost focus on the fact that England are a 2 man batting line up and a 3 man attack.
    Pakistan were in charge throughout the 1st test. Bossed the 3rd and have dominated the 4th. We have been complacent in all 4

  • James, I concur completely with every word – but most of all with your final three paragraphs. I’m glad too that Pakistan have managed to compete so hard for much of this series and have been impressed with the way they’ve gone about their business. England wanted everyone to dwell on what happened six years ago and earlier in the summer their media machine whipped up a nasty little hate campaign against a player who transgressed as a teenager and who has paid a very, very heavy penalty for what he did. (I can’t believe even KP jumped on that self-righteous bandwagon.) That Pakistan haven’t given them the satisfaction by responding with anything other than the quality of their cricket is greatly to their credit.

    Unfortunately England do seem to have a massive sense of entitlement and to be a team comprising a high proportion of churlish twats – although I’d exclude Woakes, Moeen and one or two other individuals from that description. (What are the odds that Hales will be retained now that he’s shown Broady, Jimmy and Cooky that he’s one of the lads? If I were James Vince, I’d make damn sure I broke window or verbally abused somebody before the end of the match…) That the media tends so often towards reinforcing these tendencies, rather than offering any real criticism of them, is utterly reprehensible.

    • Indeed; Misbah is a leader in a way Cook could only dream of, and that cannot be unconnected to the manner in which Pakistan have overcome their own fragilities.

  • Yeah echo all the sentiments about Pakistan.
    They play with a smile on their face, maximise their talents and generally find a way.
    The way they’ve come back from a soul destroying defeat at Edgbaston should be a lesson to everyone.

    On the England note I’m just loving the character assassination on here and a few other sites..
    Seem to be very joyous in running blokes down that they’ve never met.
    This is high level sport, yes i want sportsmanship but do I want choirboys? Not at all. All winning sides have devil, a bit of the bastard. A lot of sport is played in the mind and you have to win that battle as well.

    I think England just to choose their battles a bit more wisely.

  • Much to enjoy about that series and thanks Pakistan for giving us a good battle.

    I was delighted by Younus’ brilliant innings. It’s always been a highlight of test series for me to be able to watch great players from overseas showing their special talent

  • Great series.

    It’s not all doom and gloom; both teams have dominated one test and won a closer affair. By virtue of their superior performance in the UAE (but even that was close) I’d say Pakistan the slightly better of the two teams at the moment after this. Realistically four teams playing at a similar level on the global stage.

    England’s weaknesses have been hammered home here; namely their batting and lack of a spinner. I see no way they won’t seek to address both in the next series with Rashid appearing; question is how many batsmen do they replace and with whom. Ballance is the only one who for me could still make it; he performed the best of the three and has had the shortest run.

    If the series were starting now, I’d like to see this team given a shot in the first test:

    Cook, Hameed, Root, Bairstow, Duckett, Stokes, Ali, Woakes, Rashid, Broad, Anderson.

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